Often when I make contributions to Zinnia’s channel, I’m inundated with pleas to check out whatever GirlWritesWhat says on the subject of whatever.  Frankly, I’ve seen maybe one of GirlWritesWhat’s videos and I was disgusted enough never to go there again.  As far as I could tell, her arguments amounted to “feminists suck because they never really consider how hard it is to be a man and have to do man things.”  I felt it wasn’t worth really going any farther into the dungeon.  It’s exhausting already to explain modern social inequality to the middle of the road or gender politic unaffiliated crowd without having first to explain that feminists want to get to do “man things” and that’s the whole fucking point.  But I digress.

I’m not the kind of feminist that spends a lot of time looking into the Mens Rights “side” of things.  I don’t really think their opinions matter.  I am also not the kind of lesbian that likes to hear the American Family Association’s “side” of things.  They aren’t legitimate sides.  They’re hate groups.  One of the things about politics and social struggles that vexes me the most frequently is this idea that there must be a legitimate opposing side to every argument, from which naturally follows the idea that any resulting conclusion is not a conclusion but instead just, like, your opinion, man.  We can chant and chant about how the AFA and whatever other psycho homophobe Republican is currently running on the platform of no birth control and drug testing the unemployed is on the “wrong side of history” in hopes that future liberals will maintain their admirable track record and move things forward but why can’t they be on the wrong side of the present?

However cringe-inducing the idea may be, I don’t have to read GirlWritesWhat or anyone else who speaks of Mens “Rights” and consider it intellectually any more than I have to consider the idea that the world was created in 7 days 5,000 years ago before I agree that evolution happened.  I no longer have to consider the idea that women may not be intellectually equipped to vote because the question is temporally irrelevant.  The radical women’s movements 90 years ago, on the other hand, were forced to answer such nonsense.  How much time are we wasting by lending credence to such ignorance?  Today, I may be considered arrogant for refusing to acknowledge another side.  My opinions may be considered radical.  I’m simply exhausted of losing valuable minutes of my short life to intellectually hollow discourse.  In essence: No, GirlWritesWhat, there is no feminist conspiracy.  Now let the adults speak.

Manboobz, on the other hand, has an incredible tolerance for it.  I follow him on Twitter and every now and then, if I’m feeling chipper and could laugh at anything, I’ll click a link.  Here’s today’s find:

That’s right, folks.  Abusive relationships result in hot sex and therefore we should stop telling men not to hit women.  Telling men not to hit women makes men maim and kill women.

Stop linking me to her shit.  



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2 responses to “GirlWritesWhat

  1. mutpoint

    Question: Have you read any of Camile Paglia’s work? If you have I’d be curious as your take on Paglia’s point of view regarding the state of feminism today.

    Second, and pardon this is just my ignorance, .. is your point of view anti-male rights? I don’t think it would be considering your consideration and critical thinking regarding your essays, yet your language regarding “men” and men’s rights leave me wondering. I would think a feminist of your stature would take into account the many men who are also minorities and would not abide nor agree with the white straight male culture. Such as men who are queer, intersex, disabled, other other ethnicities, in which they would not have the “while male privelge” that many men have and are unaware of.

    Regardless: PLEASE keep posting.. I love Zinnia and would love to hear more of your voice as well!

    • There are certainly queer men, men of color, trans men, disabled men who don’t share the same rights as straight, white, able-bodied cis men, but it is not being men that deprives them of these rights. Women’s movements are no longer called women’s rights movements because (apart from reproductive rights) we mostly have them. They’re women’s equality movements now. We don’t have equality, meaning all else being equal, a woman does not enjoy the same status in the world as a man. Add whichever qualifiers you want and anyone who doubts it for a moment need only look at congress, the distribution of genders among the leaders of companies, the distribution of poverty, and rape/domestic violence statistics. The real ones, not the MRA ones. The ones where instead of polling college students’ opinions on who screams and slaps more, they count people in hospitals, shelters, and morgues as a result of domestic violence.

      Whatever you may have heard, feminism isn’t about female supremacy. That’s ridiculous. It’s about stopping violence against women. It’s about making a world where women have the same opportunities as men. It’s about putting an end to the perpetual policing of women’s sexuality, both socially and legislatively.

      It is not about claiming that men never get raped, nor is it about claiming that all men are horrible violent rapists. Most feminists are straight women. They have relationships with men and sex with men and they want to continue doing so. It’s simply about changing society so that women no longer experience sexual and partner violence disproportionately. It’s not about some absurd fantasy where nobody ever experiences violence or adversity. It’s not about winning more custody battles. In spite of what you may heard, we already lose 70% of the time when custody is contested, but in a world where women and men were seen as equals instead of as weak nurturing good-for-nothing-but-baby-making vs. big powerful money-making tycoon, it would be equal. And if that means we get custody less often by default? GOOD. Cause that means people see that we can do something other than nurse babies. It would mean that people could see us as worthy and capable of careers that could pay child support and see that men are as much and as little qualified for childcare as women. It would mean that we wouldn’t get turned down for promotions because “she might get married and quit” or “she might get pregnant” or “she will probably go on her period and fire everyone.” It’s not about having doors opened for us and getting our dinners paid for, as if women who wanted those things wanted it for feminism and not for some archaic bullshit courtship expectation that feminists work so hard to fight. MRA claims are all fucking asinine. What men’s rights activists fail to realize on a consistent, obnoxious basis, is that it ISN’T ABOUT MEN.

      Don’t make the same mistake.

      And thank you for the encouragement 🙂

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